While MSN messenger = good, MSN chat
certainly = bad. Why people even bother going on
it, is a mystery to me. Apart from the
fact that other chatlines, such as Yahoo!
Chat, are considerably better, in numerous
ways, MSN chat throw you off for the slightest
of things. In each of MSN's chatrooms, they have
a person/robot, known as the 'host'. These fiends are
responsible for removing any chatters who fail
to conform to any of MSN's six billion chat
rules. They are kept very busy. Innocent
chatters, wanting nothing more than to lose
their cyber virginity, are removed, mercilessly,
from the server. Some very minor things which
they throw you off for, include displaying URLs,
asking people for cyber (some people surely only go on chatrooms for cyber, so what a loss of potential chatters), bad language and asking
other chatters to press certain keys. The bad
language thing is almost understandable, but I
have been thrown off, for referring to the
English town of Scunthorpe (see between the S
and the H). Perhaps more ridiculously, is
the aforementioned fact, that if you ask other
chatters to press certain keys, they throw u off
chat. For example, if I were to say "press 123
to talk to a homosexual midget", they would
throw me off. Why?? What the f**k is so bad
about saying that. However, it gets worse.
This throwing off system, means that when the
host is automated, anyone who mentions the word
'press', except for at the end of a sentence, gets
chucked off, as they believe you to be encouraging
flooding. As an example of their retarded
throwing off system, and how easily you can get
thrown off, I tried the following,
below: What a fucking retard
Roderick_the_banana
: I live in Scunthorpe
•Snoopy•™
snoggggggggggggggggggggggggggs
MELLYBOT
Host Sysop_UK kicked
Roderick_the_banana out of the chat
room:
Roderick_the_banana
has left the conversation.
Thrown off for
saying where I live??
Roderick_the_banana
: press 123 if you think msn throw people off
too easily
nelikemeat17 : any 1 want 2 chat
whsiper me
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked Roderick_the_banana out
of the chat room: Asking for chat like that is
polling - please dont - it encourages
scrolling
Roderick_the_banana
has left the conversation.
The above case,
although petty, at least makes sense. Unlike the
following example:
Roderick_the_banana
: is there anyone here who wants to work for the
press, or a related area?
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked Roderick_the_banana out
of the chat room: Please don't ask people to
type rubbish
In the above
example, it appears that they thought I was
asking people to press " Or a related area ".
Hmmmm, I can just imagine other chatters
interpreting it that way.
Not.
When
the host is an actual human being (or almost
human), as opposed to a robot, it is
possible to actually talk to them. It can be
quite funny, actually. As an example of what
retarded jerks these hosts really are, I have
included a convo I had with one in pm, or "
whisper " mode, as msn insist upon calling
them.
Roderick_the_banana:
a/s/l
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: I am here to help
u and not to answer pointless timewasting
questions, such as "asl", if you having nothing
important to say please chat to someone else.
This way i can deal with real
problems.
Roderick_the_banana: you're a
rather unsociable creature, aren't u? Were u the
sort no-one liked at
school?
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: as im
saying if u havent got anything worth telling me
go away
Roderick_the_banana: I am of superior
intelligence to u. Do you want some
salt?
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: and that bothers
u? Salt?
Roderick_the_banana: For that chip
on your shoulder! Yeah, y should u be throwing
ppl out?
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: because im the
host u r the chatter
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: no
go and play
Roderick_the_banana: how do u
come to be the host? You can't even type or
punctuate. This says a lot about
msn
Roderick_the_banana: and y has msn got a
retarded throwing off
system?
Roderick_the_banana: I got thrown off
for saying the word " press ". That just isn't
fair
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: ask somone who
knows and cares
Roderick_the_banana: u ought
to know, u r the host! Anyway, perhaps it's
because they ARE retards
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»:
A reminder of the rules. No Polling, no
Scrolling (Which is saying the same thing three
times), no swearing, no ¢yber, no advertising,
no harrassing other chatters (or the
hosts ), no flooding and no racist
or sexist comments.
Roderick_the_banana:
yeah, well, you've missed some out, u also get
thrown out for displaying URLs, and for
mentioning the word " press
"
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: asking people to type
rubbish floods the screen with the same old
stupid numbers, if u want to do this goto yahoo
chat otherwise get on with
it
Roderick_the_banana: Get on with what? And
what is so bad about the same numbers coming up
on the screen? You might learn to count to 3, if
you concentrate hard enough. Oh, and Yahoo! Chat
is much better than MSN
Chat
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: go there
then
Roderick_the_banana: I recommend u
try for a job as host
there
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: there are no hosts
there fool
Roderick_the_banana: exactly,
that's y it is so much better. MSN Chat is crap,
u ought to be ashamed to be a host for them, u
Nazi! You pounce upon innocent chatters, and
remove them from chat, and along with it, you
remove their dignity and their self-confidence.
I am going to tell everyone who visits my site,
how bad msn chat is, and then no-one will ever
use it again, and you'll be left
unemployed....muahahaha! You'll have nothing to
do with your time, so will have to resort to
beastiality, once more. Alternatively, I could
just set up my own MSN chatroom, making me a
host, and I'll like, allow and encourage,
profanity, flooding, abusive behaviour, cyber
sex, and, most of all, saying the word " press
". This room will be so popular as a result,
that no-one will be left in any other room, and
all you hosts will be left alone. Anyway, I hope
u r qualified to do your job. U sure you're
retarded enough to be
host?
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•»: A reminder of the
rules. No Polling, no Scrolling (Which is saying
the same thing three times), no swearing, no
¢yber, no advertising, no harrassing other
chatters (or the hosts ), no
flooding and no racist or sexist
comments.
Roderick_the_Banana: wanna fucking
cyber?
Roderick_the_banana: wanna fucking
cyber?
Roderick_the_banana: wanna fucking
cyber?
Host
«•™º˜Th?I¢ËMâñ˜º™•» kicked Roderick_the_banana
out of the chat room: please goto yahoo chat as
we do not want disruptive people
here
Roderick_the_banana
has left the conversation.
Below
is an example of the poor-quality convo, typical
of MSN.
Roderick_the_banana
: as an msn host, do u get an inferiority
complex, when ppl mention the word " Yahoo
"?
Guest_GREATTHING : sole friere gfirl im
from london im 19,wanna chat
GeneralLady has
left the conversation.
afiikhan_18 has joined
the conversation.
misssie1 : sure have
boom
Guest_bruno has left the
conversation.
meoww_3 has joined the
conversation.
Snoopy•™ : NO WHY
????????
Guest_carrie : hi
boys
BOOMERANGGGG : wot
colou
Guest_blinkie23 has left the
conversation.
DrollerPanda3 has joined the
conversation.
BOOMERANGGGG : r
skoobyd1 :
not bad thanx
Roderick_the_banana : cause
Yahoo! is better
sdkemp : hi
carrie
Hotbabes110 : hi any lads wanna chat
whisper us 13-17
Hotbabes110 : hi any lads
wanna chat whisper us 13-17
DrollerPanda3 :
HI EVERY GEEK
Roderick_the_banana: by geek, I
take it u mean host? As the words" geek "and "
host " are synonyms
Guest_carrie :
asl
Snoopy•™ : Ahhhhh
sdkemp : lilly
?????
BOOMERANGGGG : when just
joking
«‡Ámytex‡» has left the
conversation.
So_Solid_Studd : U FUCK........
I FUCKED UR MUMMA, SHE WAS OH SOO SOLID NICE!!!
TELL HER SHE LEFT SUM WHIPPED CREAM ON THE END
OF MY NOB!! SO IL BE CHARGING HER EXTRA 2NITE!!
THANX FUCK FACE!! NOW FUCK OFF BAK 2 PAKI LAND.
COCK
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked So_Solid_Studd out of
the chat room:
Language!!!! Now go wash
your mouth out!!!!!
So_Solid_Studd has
left the conversation.
shauns_0 : hi
everyone
Guest_Alex_25_M_UK : anyone (male or
female) wants to chat to a 25yo male? whisper
me!
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² : ya big pe..
frumsapap
:
BOOMERANGGGG : cool sore of
GUY
sdkemp : whos 20 ish then
HotDaniel_1
: Can i be a fuckin host
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked HotDaniel_1 out of the
chat room: Language!!!!
Now go wash your mouth
out!!!!!
HotDaniel_1 has left
the conversation.
BOOMERANGGGG :
SORT
SeriousHeart : hi n e 1want to chat
whisper me
•Snoopy•™ :
captaincag : wankers
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked captaincag out of the
chat room: Language!!!!
Now go wash your mouth out!!!!!
captaincag has left
the conversation.
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² :
lol...
Sockdemon has joined the
conversation.
BOOMERANGGGG :
hhheheheeeeee
ˆ¤Šhÿ©ôñmåñ¤ˆ®™²ºº³ : CHUCK
US 1 DAN...........
prof_haytham has joined
the conversation.
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² : oook
ooko
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² :
oook
ˆ¤Šhÿ©ôñmåñ¤ˆ®™²ºº³ :
LOL.
tgshggfjghjkyhujkliolp : u all suck
dick
BOOMERANGGGG : is a
banann
tgshggfjghjkyhujkliolp :
lol
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² : ty crap name
frumsapap :
Your the only 1 2 get it yet!!
BOOMERANGGGG :
a
ˆ¤Šhÿ©ôñmåñ¤ˆ®™²ºº³ :
BYEEEEEEEEE
WHATEVER YA NAME IS
carmel_sundae™ has left
the conversation.
Guest_bobby has joined the
conversation.
Host •Snoopy•™
kicked tgshggfjghjkyhujkliolp out of the chat
room: Using profanity in the chatroom (Access
ban set for 15 minutes)
tgshggfjghjkyhujkliolp
has left the conversation.
?»Ð?ñì?l«?² : lol
ty snoops
BOOMERANGGGG : keep
missin
marriedman_4 is away.
Atomic36F has
left the conversation.
DJZZZZ0 : I AM A
NORTHENER
Alan_Key has joined the
conversation.
Guest_EXOTIC has left the
conversation.
Easytiga has joined the
conversation.
BOOMERANGGGG :
cumbria
Roderick_the_banana : z z z z z z z z
z , this chatroom is an embarrassment to the
net, why am I even here? Christ, I think I'll
shoot myself in the fucking bollox, as
punishment for my crime.
Host
Guide_UK_MelanieG kicked Roderick_the_banana out
of the chat room:
Language!!!! Now go wash
your mouth out!!!!!
In conclusion, I
would say that MSN Chat blows, and will never be
as good as Yahoo! Chat. Go on MSN Chat, and you
will be sent to Hell.